Phillips' Book of Great Thoughts and Funny Sayings

Phillips' Book of Great Thoughts and Funny Sayings PDF Author: Bob Phillips
Publisher: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.
ISBN: 9780842350358
Category : Quotations, English
Languages : en
Pages : 372

Book Description
A stupendous collection of quotes, quips, epigrams, witticisms, and humorous comments. For personal enjoyment and ready reference.

Bloopers, Blunders, Jokes, Quips & Quotes

Bloopers, Blunders, Jokes, Quips & Quotes PDF Author:
Publisher: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.
ISBN: 9781414305479
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 388

Book Description
More than 600 embarrassing church bloopers and pastor blunders, more than 600 hilarious jokes and jests, and more than 600 quips and quotes—all packed into one bundle of good, clean, really funny humor. A guaranteed pick-me-up, a great gift for family fun. Jim Kraus has compiled a wonderfully funny collection sure to bring smiles and laughter to all ages!

20,000 Quips & Quotes

20,000 Quips & Quotes PDF Author: Evan Esar
Publisher: Barnes & Noble Publishing
ISBN: 9781566195294
Category : Quotations, English
Languages : en
Pages : 990

Book Description

14,000 Quips and Quotes

14,000 Quips and Quotes PDF Author: E. C. McKenzie
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781565635456
Category : Bibles
Languages : en
Pages : 0

Book Description
Find that cute little quip to underscore an important point in a talk or search for "filler" for that newsletter in this compilation of 14,000 one-liners. Presented in alphabetical order by topic, it's easy to find what you're looking for--many topics have over 100 quips and one-liners. Whether you're seeking a little humor or something more thought-provoking, it's all here in "14,000 Quips and Quotes." This book is a valuable resource tool for any speaker, teacher or writer.

The 2,320 Funniest Quotes

The 2,320 Funniest Quotes PDF Author:
Publisher: Ulysses Press
ISBN: 1569759758
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 418

Book Description
ENJOY THE MOST HILARIOUS QUOTES OF ALL TIME Presenting the best of the best from AllGreatQuotes.com, this uproarious volume features gems on every topic, from sex and money to spouses and politics. Bringing together clever remarks from celebrities, politicians, thinkers, comedians and generally funny people, this collection of snappy quotes will leave you in hysterics. - God gave man a penis and a brain, but not enough blood to use both at the same time. -- Robin Williams - Money can't buy you happiness, but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery. -- Spike Milligan - Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go. -- Oscar Wilde - The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV -- Homer Simpson - When I eventually met Mr. Right, I had no idea that his fi rst name was "Always." -- Rita Rudner - Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city. -- George Burns

Oxford Dictionary of Humorous Quotations

Oxford Dictionary of Humorous Quotations PDF Author: Ned Sherrin
Publisher: Oxford University Press, USA
ISBN: 0199237166
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 574

Book Description
This hilarious collection of humorous quotations, full of wisecracks and wit, snappy comments and inspired fantasy, has been specially compiled by the late broadcaster and raconteur Ned Sherrin, with a foreword by leading British satirist, Alistair Beaton. Now packed with even more quotes and covering more subjects than before, from Weddings to the Supernatural, Australia to Headlines. Find the best lines from your favourite jokesters and wordsmiths, add that extra something to a speech or presentation, or just enjoy a good laugh. 'A chair is a piece of furniture. I am not a chair because no one has ever sat on me.' Ann Widdecombe on the announcement that Parliamentary language will now be gender-neutral. 'No wonder Bob Geldof is such an expert on famine. He's been feeding off 'I don't like Mondays' for 30 years.' Russell Brand On deciding to run for governor of California: 'The most difficult decision I've ever made in my entire life, except for the one in 1978 when I decided to get a bikini wax.' Arnold Schwarzenegger 'Wanting to know an author because you like his work is like wanting to know a duck because you like p--acirc--;t--eacute--;.' Margaret Atwood 'I am so sorry. We have to stop there. I have just come to the end of my personality.' Quentin Crisp, closing down an interview

What's So Funny About Getting Old

What's So Funny About Getting Old PDF Author: Ed Fischer
Publisher: Running Press Adult
ISBN: 147674291X
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 136

Book Description
One bonus of getting older is that it gives us a great perspective on life . . . and that includes plenty of humor! This collection of cartoons, quips, quotes, and insights introduces a new comedy genre: elderhumor. It captures the wry hilarity of our real-life sitcoms. Generational vocabulary gaps, miscommunications, preoccupation with health and comforts, foibles, disguises (for aging), even physical limitations -- all can have their funny sides when we're laughing at ourselves. One bonus of getting older is that it gives us a great perspective on life . . . and that includes plenty of humor! This collection of cartoons, quips, quotes, and insights introduces a new comedy genre: elderhumor. It captures the wry hilarity of our real-life sitcoms. Generational vocabulary gaps, miscommunications, preoccupation with health and comforts, foibles, disguises (for aging), even physical limitations -- all can have their funny sides when we're laughing at ourselves. This book, a light-hearted gift for anyone who's 50-plus, is a memoryjogger too. Remember the Katzenjammer Kids? Jack Armstrong? Apple Mary? Check out your friends' ages by their responses to a "Vanishing Words" test (examples: "spider," "broomstick skirt," "running board," "the shag"). If you're still calling the refrigerator an "icebox," it's a giveaway -- you're probably over 60. What's So Funny about Getting Old? is brought to you by a comedy team of two. Ed Fischer is an award-winning cartoonist. Jane Thomas Noland, author of Laugh It Off (what's so funny about trying to lose weight?) is a books editor and a former Minneapolis Star Tribune feature writer. Both have delicious ways of looking at life. Both, like all the rest of us, are getting older. Laughter heals. Laughter helps. Laughter keeps us in shape emotionally and physically. Read this book and try it. You'll be convinced, as these authors are, that there's only one way to grow older -- with a healthy sense of humor!

Quick Quips and Quotes

Quick Quips and Quotes PDF Author: Daniel E. Josipovich
Publisher: Bluebook
ISBN: 9780918767028
Category : Reference
Languages : en
Pages : 0

Book Description
Quips- A collection of sayings that tease all of your emotions. Some are witty, others are thought-provoking and even outrageously funny. Hire a teenager while he still knows everything. There are two great tragedies in life. One is not getting what you want and the other is getting what you want. Some days I feel like a three pound hen trying to lay a four pound egg. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it. - Author.

The Comedy Thesaurus

The Comedy Thesaurus PDF Author: Judy Brown
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781594740589
Category : Performing Arts
Languages : en
Pages : 480

Book Description
Every book of "humorous quotations" features the same tired one-liners from dead white males like Oscar Wilde and Mark Twain until now. "The Comedy Thesaurus" features more than three thousand quips from the funniest people on the planet everyone from Margaret Cho and Conan O'Brien to Eddie Murphy and Lewis Black. Arranged A to Z by subject (accidents, aging, alcohol, etc.) and thoroughly cross-referenced, it's chock-full of hilarious observations. On politics: "You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: It wasn't that long ago that we were swept away by the Macarena." Jon Stewart On shopping: "Every town has the same two malls: the one white people go to, and the one white people used to go to." Chris Rock On sex: "Engaged women have sex 2.9 times a week. And the .9 is really frustrating." Jay Leno And that's just the beginning. Full of laugh-out-loud remarks from the most popular comedians on the planet, "The Comedy Thesaurus" is a terrific resource for writers, speakers, fans of stand-up comedy, and anyone who appreciates a good joke.
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