Sun Tzu Was a Sissy

Sun Tzu Was a Sissy PDF Author: Stanley Bing
Publisher: Harper Collins
ISBN: 0061755036
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 242

Book Description
A hilarious and tough-minded guide to winning the war of contemporary life. The Chinese philosopher Sun Tzu taught that readiness is all, that knowledge of oneself and the enemy was the foundation of strength, and that those who fight best are those who are prepared and wise enough not to fight at all. Unfortunately, in the current day, this approach is pretty much horse hockey. Sun Tzu was a Sissy will transcend all those efforts and teach the reader how to make war, win, and enjoy the plunder in the real world, where those who do not kick, gouge, and grab are left behind at the table to pay the tab. Students of Bing will be taught how to plan and execute battles that hurt other people a lot, and advance their flags and those of their friends.

Crazy Bosses

Crazy Bosses PDF Author: Stanley Bing
Publisher: Harper Collins
ISBN: 0061873861
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 292

Book Description
Jam-packed with new anecdotes, updated references, and modernized jokes, Stanley Bing’s seminal investigation of what makes bosses crazy is now revised for a new generation. Fans of television’s The Office and the cult film Office Space will love this classic guide to the universal workplace phenomenon of crazy bosses, now updated for a new century’s worth of insane supervisors. Bestselling author and business guru Stanley Bing’s Crazy Bosses identifies the various types of crazy bosses—the boss with the five brains, the bully, the paranoid boss, the narcissist, the “bureaucrazy,” and the disaster hunter—and offers readers concrete strategies on how to cope, and, most importantly, how not to become crazy bosses themselves.

Throwing the Elephant

Throwing the Elephant PDF Author: Stanley Bing
Publisher: Harper Collins
ISBN: 0061791318
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 244

Book Description
Stanley Bing follows his enormously successful What Would Machiavelli Do? with another subversively humorous exploration of how work would be different—if the Buddha were your personal consultant. What would the Buddha do—if he had to deal with a rampaging elephant of a boss every day? That is the premise of Stanley Bing’s wickedly funny guide to finding inner peace in the face of relentlessly obnoxious, huge, and sometimes smelly bosses. Taking the concept of managing up to a new cosmic plateau, Bing urges no less than a revolution of the spirit in the American workplace, turning overwrought, oppressed, stressed-out employees into models of Zen-like powers of concentration, able to take their elephant-like bosses and grey, lumbering companies and twirl them around the little finger of their consciousness. In Bing’s unique tradition of social criticism cum business self-help, Throwing the Elephant presents Four Truths (or possibly Five), a Ninefold Path, and one useful, hilarious guide to workplace sanity, success, and enlightenment that surpasses all understanding, survival.

Rome, Inc

Rome, Inc PDF Author: Stanley Bing
Publisher: W. W. Norton
ISBN: 9780393329452
Category : Corporate state
Languages : en
Pages : 0

Book Description
The world's first corporate case study, as only the best-selling Stanley Bing could tell it.

The Number

The Number PDF Author: Lee Eisenberg
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 0743270320
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 290

Book Description
Backed by imaginative reporting and insights, Eisenberg urges people to assume control and responsibility for their standard of living, and take greater aim on their long-term aspirations. Not an investment guide, this is a revealing look at common financial and emotional conflicts and how to control them.

Lloyd, what Happened

Lloyd, what Happened PDF Author: Stanley Bing
Publisher: Crown
ISBN:
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 440

Book Description
A satirical novel on the corporate world as it tries to get fewer people to do more for less money. The hero is Lloyd, a corporate flunkey preparing a merger that will cost thousands of workers their job, some of whom are his friends. A first novel.

The Curriculum

The Curriculum PDF Author: Stanley Bing
Publisher: Harper Collins
ISBN: 006227483X
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 381

Book Description
From the mind of the ultimate corporate gunslinger comes this no-nonsense, real-world curriculum, designed to augment—if not replace—the more traditional path to achieving mastery of the business universe. Conquer this sharp, practical and often amusing course of study and save $250,000 of wasted business school tuition. Unlike those august, Ivy-encrusted factories that churn out masterful business administrators, The Curriculum will teach you the art of business, employing a smart, tactical battle plan that will prove infinitely more awesome as you make your way in the world. We begin, in the Core Curriculum, with the acquisition and maintenance of Power. Included are such essentials as Not Appearing Stupid (an early career requirement), Fabricating A Sustainable Business Personality, and the arts of Management and Selling. The Advanced Curriculum hones the skills that are required to seize Success by the throat and shake it until valuable prizes fall out of its pockets, including fundamentals on Strategic Thinking, Self-Branding, mastering Electronic Communications, and dealing with Crazy People. Tutorials and Electives, which students may pursue as their interest or discretion advises, include lessons on Giving an Effective Presentation, Business Drinking, and the Care and Feeding of Ultra-Senior Officers. Lavishly enhanced with numerous charts, graphs, and other illuminating business illustrations, and backed up by years of study from Mr. Bing’s proprietary research organization (The National Association of Serious Studies), The Curriculum will occupy a place of pride on any bookshelf dedicated to the study of business, how it works, and how it can be used against those who don’t know how it works.

100 Bullshit Jobs...And How to Get Them

100 Bullshit Jobs...And How to Get Them PDF Author: Stanley Bing
Publisher: Harper Collins
ISBN: 0060734809
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 322

Book Description
The scholarly discipline of Bullshit Studies has blossomed in the last several years, fertilized by a number of critical works on the subject and the growing importance of the issue across a wide range of professions. Now, best-selling author and lifelong practitioner Stanley Bing enters the field with a comprehensive look at the many attractive jobs now available to those who are serious about their bullshit and prepared to dedicate their working life to it. What, Bing inquires, do a feng shui consultant, new media executive, wine steward, department store greeter, and Vice President of the United States have in common? What, too, are the actual duties performed by a McKinsey consultant? Other than sitting around making people nervous? Could that possibly be his core function? Likewise, what does an aromatherapist actually do, per se? Sniff things and rub them on people, for big fragrant bucks? Is that all? The answer in all cases is "Yes." They all have bullshit jobs. These few, of course, are just the beginning. Across the length and breadth of this shrinking globe, skillful bullshit artists have secured pleasant, lucrative employment, and are enjoying themselves more than you are. In virtually every occupation, from Advertising to Yoga Franchising, lucky individuals who "work" in these coveted positions enjoy the best lives imaginable -- they are paid well, they rarely break a sweat, and their professions are highly respected, because nobody really knows what they do. At once funny, useful, and tolerably philosophical, this groundbreaking work takes a close look at 100 bullshit jobs -- the money they bring with them, the actual tasks and activities involved (if any), and famous and successful examples of each position, who will provide the neophyte with inspiration. Most crucially, Bing goes on to offer what others so far have not--a clear, concise strategy to help job-seekers at every level reach for that brass ring, knowing full well that it may be attached to the nose of a bull.

What Would Machiavelli Do?

What Would Machiavelli Do? PDF Author: Stanley Bing
Publisher: Harper Collins
ISBN: 006175580X
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 178

Book Description
A sly send-up of the successful What Would Jesus Do? books, here is a satisfyingly mean light-hearted approach to business success—the Machiavellian way. Machiavellians may not get to heaven, but on earth they have a definite edge on the competition. In this pithy and discretely vicious guide, Stanley Bing shows how the Florentine master statesman and political thinker would handle today’s myriad corporate challenges, seize the future by the throat, and make it cough up money, power, and superior office space. So, what exactly would Machiavelli do? He would exploit himself only slightly less than he exploits others. He would be in love with his destiny. He would, for the most part, be a paranoid freak. He would always be at war. He would cultivate a few well-loved enemies. He would have a couple of good friends, too. He would acquire his neighbor. He would think BIG. He would move forward like a great shark, eating as he goes. And much, much more. More than a road map to success, this hands-on guide will help anyone get what they want, whether or not they deserve it.

Snakes in the Jungle

Snakes in the Jungle PDF Author: Jim Truscott
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781922229960
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 302

Book Description
It contains the memoirs of a special operative in war and business. Operations in war time are all about crisis management. It is akin to a sales manual for merchant adventurers at the juxtaposition of military and economic warfare. Written in the same vein as 'Sun Tzu Was a Sissy, The Real Art of War' by Stanley Bing, it will be enjoyed by readers interested in autobiography, SAS, war, adventure and business. People like reading about human foibles in barracks and boardrooms. The first part is historical and biographical and the second part is philosophical. There are few books written by former SAS officers on history, war, adventure, family and business. In the Judeo-Christian tradition the snake is an evil idea, a sneak, a liar, one hundred percent bad but in China a Taipan is literally top class or big shot used for a senior business executive or entrepreneur. In my case Taipan was my clandestine guerrilla warfare name. Up until now few people knew this. When I first started writing about 15 years ago the memoirs were called Feral Major. The Military Secretary called me this when I was exiled in the Pilbara, and he wanted to know whether I still wore shoes to work. After some introspection I changed the title to Pushing the Boundaries based upon my ability to extend the rule books. Then for a long while it was called Instinct for Dissent, largely due to my ability to disobey lawful commands and survive the prospects of courts martials. Then came a light bulb moment, while prospering after 15 years in the bastardry of business and Screw-You University!
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