Putting the Fun in Funeral

Author: Diana Pharaoh Francis
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781944756079
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 0

Book Description
Beck Wyatt has always hated her mother-enough to kill her. As luck would have it, someone beats her to murdering Mommy Dearest and now Beck gets to plan the tackiest funeral the world has ever seen for the worst woman she's ever known.But first, Beck has a few minor problems to deal with. First on the list? Avoid getting kidnapped. She also has to convince the police she didn't kill her mother. And then there's surviving a death curse ¿.With the help of her three best friends, cheesecake, and a little magic, Beck figures she can handle anything, even the mysterious and irritating Damon Matroviani, whose sexy good-looks light her panties on fire.All too soon, her life is turned inside out, and just when things are looking like they can't get any worse ¿ everything hits the fan.

Who Put the 'Fun' in Funeral?

Author: Jan Tury
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781456776183
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 204

Book Description
In 1980 Jan Tury started his working life as a funeral apprentice. After spending many years in the profession dedicated to helping others, an opportunity arose in 2003 that would change his life forever. Never accepting of an easy life embarked on a mission to succeed and prove to himself and others that ordinary people can and do make a difference. In this book he tells of the many challenges he faced with what was considered at the time a very guarded profession. Through the fullness of time he has also been privy to some of those priceless moments that have put the 'fun' in funeral. In writing this, it is hoped the reader will be all the more enriched and leave with a smile.

Dark Needs at Night's Edge

Author: Kresley Cole
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1849834296
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 338

Book Description
On the night lovely Néomi Renate, a famous ballerina at the turn of the century, was murdered, an evil force turned her into a spectre - a phantom that's neither alive nor dead - and cursed her to relive her harrowing death every month during the full moon. Unable to leave her home, she has managed to scare away any trespassers, until she encounters an inhabitant even more terrifying than Néomi herself. When Conrad Wroth, a vampire warlord who's been half-mad for centuries, first beholds Néomi, he knows nothing will stop him from claiming the ethereal beauty as his own - not even death itself. Yet even if the gruff warrior can win her love and defeat the evil that surrounds her, he still must determine a way to bring her fully back to life, and back to him.

Who put the 'fun' in funeral?

Author:
Publisher: AuthorHouse
ISBN: 1467892025
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 125

Book Description

Dead Jokes

Author: Jim Reaper
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781724152206
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 56

Book Description
Put the fun back in funeral with DEAD JOKES. A collection of tasteless jokes about death. Nothing is off limits.Most of these joke are crude and if you are easily offended then maybe you should check out DAD JOKES which are typically far less shocking. These jokes are not politically correct and will offend some people. Not suitable for children. Not suitable for adults who are not morally corrupt.

Denton Little's Deathdate

Author: Lance Rubin
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 147112424X
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 308

Book Description
'Denton's funny, self-effacing genuineness will keep readers rooting for him' Kirkus Reviews 'Full belly-laugh funny' Notes From The Underground 'Freaking hilarious' goodreads.com 'Very, very funny . . . fresh, original and an absolute joy to read' thebookbag.co.uk 'This book! Oh my god, this book is brilliant! … It's so exciting and awesome! Who has ever heard of a teen angsty, hilariously funny, fast-paced, exciting dystopian? I love it!' Once Upon a Bookcase The first of two books, Denton Little's Deathdateis an utterly gripping read - with a killer plot twist, hilarious characters, and atruly memorable voice. Imminent death has never been so funny!Denton Little's Deathdatetakes place in a world exactly like our own - except that everyone knows the day on which they will die. For Denton, that's in just two days - the day of his senior prom. Despite his early deathdate, Denton has always wanted to live a normal life - but his final days are filled with dramatic firsts. First hangover. First sex. First love triangle (the first sex seems to have happened not with his adoring girlfriend, but with his best friend's sister. Though he's not totallysure - see, first hangover). His anxiety builds when he discovers a mysterious purple rash making its way up his body. Is this what will kill him? Then a strange man shows up at his funeral, claiming to have known Denton's long-deceased mother, and warning him to beware of suspicious characters . . . Suddenly Denton's life is filled with mysterious questions and precious little time to find the answers. Debut author Lance Rubin takes us on a fast, gripping, and outrageously funny ride through the last hours of a teenager's life as he searches for love, meaning and (just maybe) a way to live on . . .

The End of Something Wonderful

Author: Stephanie V. W. Lucianovic
Publisher: Union Square & Co.
ISBN: 1454941375
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 31

Book Description
With gentle humor and quirkiness, this sympathetic book demonstrates how to say goodbye to a beloved pet and give it a proper sendoff. “[The End of Something Wonderful is] really good. It’s funny and sardonic and it gets to be touching at the end.” —Betsy Bird, School Library Journal Children love their pets very much—and when the animals die, that loss can be hard to process. The End of Something Wonderful helps kids handle their feelings when they’re hurting and can’t find all the right words. In a warm, understanding, sometimes funny way, it guides children as they plan a backyard funeral to say goodbye, from choosing a box and a burial spot to giving a eulogy and wiping away tears. Most of all, it reassures them that it’s not the end of everything . . . and that Something Wonderful can always happen again.

A Comedian Walks Into A Funeral Home

Author: Dennis Kelly
Publisher:
ISBN: 9780692845486
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 266

Book Description
Vince Locker's life is tragic. His comedy act for the LaughCom competition has just bombed, ruining any chance of the cash prize he desperately needed. His life is in tatters; abandoned by his father as a child, an estranged wife, Jessica, who he seems to disappoint just by his mere existence, and living in his mother's house with his bipolar brother and facing foreclosure. As he stands on Smith Avenue Bridge, suicide seems the only option until he is unexpectedly rescued by an old school mortician named Truss. Vince meets another of Truss's rescues, Winona. Although beyond social norms, the trio seize on a quick cash fix that just might help Vince meet his child support demands-comedic tributes for the dead. The eulogies are hilarious and off the wall, sometimes disastrous and sometimes enlightening. They propel Vince into the dark underworld of the funeral industry, life insurance scams, savage politics, a kidnapping, the murder investigation of a destitute unclaimed young woman and threats to Jessica and his young daughter. As details of the murdered young woman are slowly revealed, Vince realizes that he has many ghosts of his own to put to rest. The story is a brilliant thought-provoking exploration of grief and death nested in clever humor.

Funerals to Die For

Author: Kathy Benjamin
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 144055708X
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 227

Book Description
True stories that put the, er, "fun" back into funerals! The hereafter may still be part of the great unknown, but with Funerals to Die For you can unearth the rich--and often, dark--history of funeral rites. From getting a portrait painted with a loved one's ashes to purchasing a safety coffin complete with bells and breathing tubes, this book takes you on a whirlwind tour of funeral customs and trivia from all over the globe. Inside, you'll find more than 100 unbelievable traditions, practices, and facts, such as: The remains of a loved one can be launched into deep space for only $1,000. In Taiwan, strippers are hired to entertain funeral guests throughout the ceremony. Undertakers for the Tongan royal family weren't allowed to use their hands for 100 days after preparing a king's body. In the late 1800s, New Englanders would gulp down a cocktail of water and their family member's ashes in order to keep them from returning as vampires. Whether you fear being buried alive or just have a morbid curiosity of the other side, Funerals to Die For examines what may happen when another person dies.

It's Your Funeral!

Author: Kathy Benjamin
Publisher: National Geographic Books
ISBN: 1683692586
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 0

Book Description
You can’t attend your own funeral. But you can have a blast planning it! Death is scary—but planning your funeral doesn't have to be! It's Your Funeral! will help demystify death, decrease your anxiety, and put the fun back in funeral, whether that means a drunken bacchanal or a somber reflection on just how great you were. Every stage of the legacy planning process is considered, from a burial outfit to a funeral theme. Practical and cheeky questions alike are answered, including: • What is the most eco-friendly burial method? • Can I write my own obituary? • Can my body be shot into space after I die? • How can I manage my digital legacy? Offering a plethora of curious facts, strange stories, and inspiration to help you think outside the coffin, It’s Your Funeral! includes worksheets that will ensure your wishes are recorded for posterity. Planning for death should be the time of your life, so let’s get started!