I Will Not Go the F**k to Sleep

Author: Richard Crasta
Publisher: Invisible Man Press
ISBN:
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 107

Book Description
What if a child, asked to go the f**k to sleep by its father, could respond in adult language? What if 5000 Indian yogis simultaneously dropped hot coffee on their laps in 5000 McDonalds to balance India's budget? How about selling used nukes to help balance the budget deficit? By the father of 3 boys and one Inner Brat that refuses to go to sleep or to grow up, this broad anthology of humor is his bestselling e-book. "Pythonesque," silly, and sophisticated at the same time, according to reviewers. I WILL NOT GO THE F**K TO SLEEP is an anytime book for adults who refuse to grow up or to go to sleep in this unreal and wacky world of jet-setting yogis, retired nukes, and presidents named Bush. Profane, compassionate, wickedly funny at times, it captures a world and a humor that is fresh, subversive, and often thought-provoking. You probably should not read it to your children under 15; but don’t be surprised if they decide to read it to you. "Hysterical and informative. For the rebel in you. Great style and humor"--Linda J. Lundy, 5-star review This edition restores the ORIGINAL cover which was so popular with readers.

Go the F**k to Sleep

Author: Adam Mansbach
Publisher: Akashic Books
ISBN: 1453271023
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 18

Book Description
The #1 New York Times Bestseller: “A hilarious take on that age-old problem: getting the beloved child to go to sleep” (NPR). “Hell no, you can’t go to the bathroom. You know where you can go? The f**k to sleep.” Go the Fuck to Sleep is a book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate, and radically honest, it captures the familiar—and unspoken—tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night. Read by a host of celebrities, from Samuel L. Jackson to Jennifer Garner, this subversively funny bestselling storybook will not actually put your kids to sleep, but it will leave you laughing so hard you won’t care.

Seriously, Just Go to Sleep

Author: Adam Mansbach
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 1453257802
Category : Juvenile Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 36

Book Description
The G-rated, child-friendly version of the hilarious #1 New York Times bestselling classic! Go the F*** to Sleep, the picture book for adults, became a cultural sensation by striking a universal chord for parents (with a bit of potty-mouth language to help them vent their frustration). Now, Adam Mansbach and Ricardo Cortés reunite with Seriously, Just Go to Sleep, inviting the children themselves in on the joke. Of course, kids are well aware of how difficult they can be at bedtime. With Mansbach’s new child-appropriate narrative, kids will recognize their tactics, giggle at their own mischievousness, and empathize with their parents’ struggles—a perspective most children’s books don’t capture. Most importantly, it provides a common ground for children and their parents to talk about one of their most stressful daily rituals. This fresh rendition includes Cortés’s updated illustrations, with a cameo appearance by Samuel L. Jackson, who narrated the audio book version of Go the F*** to Sleep

The Special Edition of the World's Greatest Mysteries

Author: Mark Twain
Publisher: DigiCat
ISBN:
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 1396

Book Description
DigiCat presents to you this unique and meticulously edited murder mystery collection: Detective Stories The Purloined Letter (Edgar Allan Poe) A Scandal in Bohemia (A. Conan Doyle) The Safety Match (Anton Chekhov) Missing: Page Thirteen (Anna Katherine Green) . . . Suspense Stories The Birth Mark (Nathaniel Hawthorne) The Oblong Box (Edgar Allan Poe) A Terribly Strange Bed (Wilkie Collins) The Torture by Hope (Villiers de l'Isle Adam) The Mysterious Card (Cleveland Moffett) . . . Ghost Stories Thrawn Janet (Robert Louis Stevenson) The Horla (Guy de Maupassant) To Sura: A Letter (Pliny the Younger) . . . The Man Who Went Too Far (E.F. Benson) The Phantom Rickshaw (Rudyard Kipling) The Apparition of Mrs. Veal (Daniel Defoe) The Damned Thing (Ambrose Bierce) . . . The Deserted House (E. T. A. Hoffmann) The Withered Arm (Thomas Hardy) The House and the Brain (Lord Edward Bulwer-Lytton) The Roll-Call of the Reef (A. T. Quiller-Couch) The Open Door (Mrs. Margaret Oliphant) . . . Paranormal Psychic Stories When the World Was Young (Jack London) Joseph—A Story (Katherine Rickford) Ligeia(Edgar Allan Poe) A Ghost (Lafcadio Hearn) The Eyes of the Panther (Ambrose Bierce) Photographing Invisible Beings (William T. Stead) The Sin-Eater (Fiona Macleod) . . . Humorous Mystery Stories The Secret of Goresthorpe Grange (A. Conan Doyle) Mr. Bloke's Item (Mark Twain) The Man Who Went Too Far (E. F. Benson) The Man With The Pale Eyes (Guy de Maupassant) . . .

The Idea of You

Author: Robinne Lee
Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin
ISBN: 125012591X
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 320

Book Description
Now an original movie on Prime Video starring Anne Hathaway and Nicholas Galitzine! When Solène Marchand, the thirty-nine-year-old owner of a prestigious art gallery in Los Angeles, takes her daughter, Isabelle, to meet her favorite boy band, she does so reluctantly and at her ex-husband’s request. The last thing she expects is to make a connection with one of the members of the world-famous August Moon. But Hayes Campbell is clever, winning, confident, and posh, and the attraction is immediate. That he is all of twenty years old further complicates things. What begins as a series of clandestine trysts quickly evolves into a passionate relationship. It is a journey that spans continents as Solène and Hayes navigate each other’s disparate worlds: from stadium tours to international art fairs to secluded hideaways in Paris and Miami. And for Solène, it is as much a reclaiming of self, as it is a rediscovery of happiness and love. When their romance becomes a viral sensation, and both she and her daughter become the target of rabid fans and an insatiable media, Solène must face how her new status has impacted not only her life, but the lives of those closest to her.

I Will Not Go the F**k to Sleep (Special Edition)

Author: Benny Profane
Publisher: Createspace Independent Pub
ISBN: 9781477476840
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 150

Book Description
By a widely published author and father of 3 children, 12 books, and 1 kicking and screaming Inner Child that refuses to grow up or to go to sleep, this special edition of "I Will Not Go the F**k to Sleep" imagines: --What if a child, asked to go the f**k to sleep by its father, could respond in adult language? --A band of 5000 yogis flown in from India specifically to balance India's budget deficit by spilling coffee on their laps at 5,000 McDonald's restaurants. --A Nuclear Weapons fire sale to help balance America's deficit --What does it feel like to send your pet cat to a cat home or cat shelter, or to return a long-dead ex-chicken to an American supermarket? --The story of an Indian men's magazine which ran a special Sex Issue, with condoms glued to the inside of the magazine for readers who might be too carnally provoked to search for a condom. The e-book edition was No. 2 on Amazon's Political Humor bestseller list for nearly 5 weeks. This expanded Special Edition, while providing two chapters of comical Daddy-child interaction, and two other child or parenting-related essays, then moves into a broader world of no-holds-barred social, political, and sexual satire and intercultural humor, some of it new. For the first time, this book publishes the complete "Death of a Minister" a ferocious political satire with references to the Indian and American political landscape (John F. Kennedy and Camelot, for example). "Hysterical and informative. For the rebel in you. Great style and humor"--Linda J. Lundy, Amazon 5-star review "Inspired silliness, Pythonesque goofiness, political bite."--Laurie Boris, Author of "The Joke's on Me." About the Author: Benny Profane is the alter ego of Richard Crasta, author of twelve other books, including the widely published and critically acclaimed THE REVISED KAMA SUTRA and WHAT WE ALL NEED.

Verity

Author: Colleen Hoover
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
ISBN: 153872474X
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 295

Book Description
Whose truth is the lie? Stay up all night reading the sensational psychological thriller that has readers obsessed, from the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Too Late and It Ends With Us. #1 New York Times Bestseller · USA Today Bestseller · Globe and Mail Bestseller · Publishers Weekly Bestseller Lowen Ashleigh is a struggling writer on the brink of financial ruin when she accepts the job offer of a lifetime. Jeremy Crawford, husband of bestselling author Verity Crawford, has hired Lowen to complete the remaining books in a successful series his injured wife is unable to finish. Lowen arrives at the Crawford home, ready to sort through years of Verity’s notes and outlines, hoping to find enough material to get her started. What Lowen doesn’t expect to uncover in the chaotic office is an unfinished autobiography Verity never intended for anyone to read. Page after page of bone-chilling admissions, including Verity's recollection of the night her family was forever altered. Lowen decides to keep the manuscript hidden from Jeremy, knowing its contents could devastate the already grieving father. But as Lowen’s feelings for Jeremy begin to intensify, she recognizes all the ways she could benefit if he were to read his wife’s words. After all, no matter how devoted Jeremy is to his injured wife, a truth this horrifying would make it impossible for him to continue loving her.

The Dead Run

Author: Adam Mansbach
Publisher: Harper Collins
ISBN: 0062199676
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 339

Book Description
Adam Mansbach, the acclaimed #1 New York Times bestselling author of Go the F**k to Sleep and Rage Is Back, turns to a new tale of suspense, horror, and supernatural action Wrongfully imprisoned in a Mexican jail, outlaw-with-a-conscience Jess Galvan accepts a devil's bargain: transport a sinister package across the border in twenty-four hours for the jail's mythical—and terrifying—bogeyman El Cucuy. If Jess can make it across alive and give the iron box to cult leader Aaron Seth, he will be free and able to regain custody of his estranged daughter. But as Jess navigates a blighted desert full of deadly surprises, girls go missing on both sides of the border and bodies begin to surface. It's a deadly epidemic of crime that plunges small-town sheriff Bob Nichols into a monster of an investigation he's not equipped to handle, especially when sixteen-year-old Sherry disappears. An ancient evil has awoken in the empty wastelands along the border and now everyone—the innocent and the guilty alike—must face their deepest fears as epic myth and human malice combine to bring forth the end of the world as we know it. With The Dead Run, acclaimed author Adam Mansbach mixes horror, the supernatural, and suspense to deliver a chilling, high-octane adventure.

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck

Author: Mark Manson
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 006245773X
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 197

Book Description
#1 New York Times Bestseller Over 10 million copies sold In this generation-defining self-help guide, a superstar blogger cuts through the crap to show us how to stop trying to be "positive" all the time so that we can truly become better, happier people. For decades, we’ve been told that positive thinking is the key to a happy, rich life. "F**k positivity," Mark Manson says. "Let’s be honest, shit is f**ked and we have to live with it." In his wildly popular Internet blog, Manson doesn’t sugarcoat or equivocate. He tells it like it is—a dose of raw, refreshing, honest truth that is sorely lacking today. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is his antidote to the coddling, let’s-all-feel-good mindset that has infected American society and spoiled a generation, rewarding them with gold medals just for showing up. Manson makes the argument, backed both by academic research and well-timed poop jokes, that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to stomach lemons better. Human beings are flawed and limited—"not everybody can be extraordinary, there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault." Manson advises us to get to know our limitations and accept them. Once we embrace our fears, faults, and uncertainties, once we stop running and avoiding and start confronting painful truths, we can begin to find the courage, perseverance, honesty, responsibility, curiosity, and forgiveness we seek. There are only so many things we can give a f**k about so we need to figure out which ones really matter, Manson makes clear. While money is nice, caring about what you do with your life is better, because true wealth is about experience. A much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders-and-look-you-in-the-eye moment of real-talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is a refreshing slap for a generation to help them lead contented, grounded lives.

To Sleep in a Sea of Stars

Author: Christopher Paolini
Publisher: Tor Books
ISBN: 1250762901
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 848

Book Description
Now a New York Times and USA Today bestseller! Winner of Best Science Fiction in the 2020 Goodreads Choice Awards! To Sleep in a Sea of Stars is a brand new epic novel from #1 New York Times bestselling author of Eragon, Christopher Paolini. Kira Navárez dreamed of life on new worlds. Now she's awakened a nightmare. During a routine survey mission on an uncolonized planet, Kira finds an alien relic. At first she's delighted, but elation turns to terror when the ancient dust around her begins to move. As war erupts among the stars, Kira is launched into a galaxy-spanning odyssey of discovery and transformation. First contact isn't at all what she imagined, and events push her to the very limits of what it means to be human. While Kira faces her own horrors, Earth and its colonies stand upon the brink of annihilation. Now, Kira might be humanity's greatest and final hope . . . The Fractalverse Series To Sleep in a Sea of Stars Fractal Noise At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.