Author: Mark Barry Publisher: SP Books ISBN: 9781561710454 Category : Humor Languages : en Pages : 196
Book Description
Today's most outrageous jokes told the way they should be--with no guilt, shame, or beating around the bush. These jokes are so off-color and gross that not even Sam Kinison or Andrew Dice Clay would touch them! Barry has appeared on the Regis Philbin Show and hundreds of humorous TV commercials.
Author: Marilyn Huntman Giese Publisher: Xlibris Corporation ISBN: 1796064769 Category : Poetry Languages : en Pages : 92
Book Description
Nursery Rhymes Your Mother Never Taught You brings wry humor in the form of parodies to twenty-four of the world’s best-loved nursery rhymes. The parodies in Part I are a reaction to the people and politics of the 21st century. They are matched with the traditional nursery rhymes that are found in Part II. These original versions include some bizarre historical theories as to derivation; also, their first known publication dates are given. All the rhymes are divided into four sections: Food, Fun, People, and Politics. At the end of each section in Part I there are three thoughts to ponder for each parody. They range from such as, ‘What does food have to do with marital bliss?’ to ‘Who was the bully in your school?’ Caution: discussions are recommended for good-natured groups only!
Author: Kaylie Jones Publisher: Harper Collins ISBN: 0061936499 Category : Biography & Autobiography Languages : en Pages : 388
Book Description
Her mother was a brainy knockout with the sultry beauty of Marilyn Monroe, a raconteur whose fierce wit could shock an audience into hilarity or silence. Her father was a distinguished figure in American letters, the National Book Award–winning author of four of the greatest novels of World War II ever written. A daughter of privilege with a seemingly fairy-tale-like life, Kaylie Jones was raised in the Hamptons via France in the 1960s and '70s, surrounded by the glitterati who orbited her famous father, James Jones. Legendary for their hospitality, her handsome, celebrated parents held court in their home around an antique bar—an eighteenth-century wooden pulpit taken from a French village church—playing host to writers, actors, movie stars, film directors, socialites, diplomats, an emperor, and even the occasional spy. Kaylie grew up amid such family friends as William Styron, Irwin Shaw, James Baldwin, and Willie Morris, and socialized with the likes of Truman Capote, Norman Mailer, George Plimpton, and Kurt Vonnegut. Her beloved father showed young Kaylie the value of humility, hard work, and education, with its power to overcome ignorance, intolerance, and narrow-mindedness, and instilled in her a love of books and knowledge. From her mother, Gloria, she learned perfect posture, the twist, the fear of abandonment, and soul-shattering cruelty. Two constants defined Kaylie's childhood: literature and alcohol. "Only one word was whispered in the house, as if it were the worst insult you could call someone," she writes, "alcoholic was a word my parents reserved for the most appalling and shameful cases—drunks who made public scenes or tried to kill themselves or ended up in the street or in an institution. If you could hold your liquor and go to work, you were definitely not an alcoholic." When her father died from heart failure complicated by years of drinking, sixteen-year-old Kaylie was broken and lost. For solace she turned to his work, looking beyond the man she worshipped to discover the artist and his craft, determined that she too would write. Her loss also left her powerless to withstand her mother's withering barbs and shattering criticism, or halt Gloria's further descent into a bottle—one of the few things mother and daughter shared. From adolescence, Kaylie too used drink as a refuge, a way to anesthetize her sadness, anger, and terror. For years after her father's death, she denied the blackouts, the hangovers, the lost days, the rage, the depression. Broken and bereft, she began reading her father's novels and those writers who came before and after him—and also pursued her own writing. With this, she found the courage to open the door on the truth of her own addiction. Lies My Mother Never Told Me is the mesmerizing and luminously told story of Kaylie's battle with alcoholism and her struggle to flourish despite the looming shadow of a famous father and an emotionally abusive and damaged mother. Deeply intimate, brutally honest, yet limned by humor and grace, it is a beautifully written tale of personal evolution, family secrets, second chances, and one determined woman's journey to find her own voice—and the courage to embrace a life filled with possibility, strength, and love.
Author: Yvonne Craig Inskip Publisher: Author House ISBN: 1481796496 Category : Family & Relationships Languages : en Pages : 390
Book Description
Im six years old and having a life crisis. Are you my mummy? is the question I could never ask because I love both my mothers equally: Tyna, the tiny one and Bigga, who is bigger. I havent got a daddy either, and it seems rude to ask. This is a sharp and entertaining true story, beginning in war-torn London, of how the author navigated her way through family passions and oddities, secrets and multiple identities. On the way she encounters a Christmas pudding sent annually care of the Bank of Scotland; sitting on a Tutors cat during a Cambridge University interview; running the family corner shop as a school girl; discovering a cache of beautiful postcards from all over Europe; and the seaside wedding of one of her mothers. One of my mothers is has yet another stroke. Im by her side when the consultant points to a scar on her belly and asks her what it is. Silently she raises her hand and gestures towards me. A Caesarean section all those years ago. I am her daughter. We never speak of it. After Bigga and Tyna died, I begin a paper trail to find news of my father. One morning I walk across Westminster Bridge to meet a half-sister. I have been an only child for 50 years. Over lunch I discover that I am the sixth of seven siblings born to four women - and I have a famous Swiss grandfather. The book ends by tackling some questions Im often asked, such as: Were your mothers lesbians? Does a child need a father? Is the past good for you? Do therapists help?
Author: W. J. Burkland Publisher: CreateSpace ISBN: 9781482326567 Category : Humor Languages : en Pages : 42
Book Description
Recalling Shel Silverstein's "Falling Up" by way of Comedy Central's "South Park", Burkland's collection of bawdy rhymes is as clever as it is irreverent, skewering the politically correct at every turn. Never crossing the line into the profane, he is able to entertain while pushing the limits of the crude, silly, and sophomoric. Perfect bite-sized nuggets of hilarity that are sure to leave you laughing out loud, Rhymes My Mother Never Told Me tickles the funny bone as it challenges the status quo. Wonderfully playful and always mischievous, Burkland's debut defiantly thumbs its nose at the world of propriety and decorum. This collection features beloved classics such as: “Sweet Bread Farts,” where Nick's special talent is having the gas he passes smell like freshly baked maple bars; “Tony's Tiny Bladder,” where a boy with a tiny bladder goes from disgraced pants-wetter to superhero; and “Sammy Squirrel's Tragic Picnic,” where Sammy Squirrel and his animal friends are enjoying a tasty picnic…until a speeding truck puts an end to their fun. The author turns the world on its head to find humor in the oddest of places. Illustrations by Duncan Beedie bring to life the wonderfully twisted world of taunting floaters, adventurous boogers, untimely sneezes and squirrels in imminent danger. Rhymes My Mother Never Told Me includes; Sweet Bread Farts Sammy Squirrel's Tragic Picnic When I sleep, I drool A Baby and his Coffee The Epic Tale of Nate's Booger Egg Salad Toes Jimmy vs. The Floater The Impact of Old Age on Jack, Who Was Once a Nimble Boy The Poop Between Her Toes An Untimely Sneeze The 7th Planet Big Bird and Barney Makeshift Candle The Zit on the Wart on My Chin Idunno & Idontcare Underwear Art Nose Hair Back Splash Sniffer the Dog Distinctive Chins Urinal Cakes An Older Sister's Perspective Santa's Annual Check-up My Spleen Does Very Little Scab Picker (and Eater) Tony's Tiny Bladder Misplacing Baby Emily While Finding a Deal on Beef Stew
Author: Chris Harris Publisher: Little, Brown Books for Young Readers ISBN: 0316266590 Category : Juvenile Fiction Languages : en Pages : 196
Book Description
The instant New York Times bestseller featured on NPR's Weekend Edition with Scott Simon! B. J. Novak (bestselling author of The Book With No Pictures) described this groundbreaking poetry collection as "Smart and sweet, wild and wicked, brilliantly funny--it's everything a book for kids should be." Lauded by critics as a worthy heir to such greats as Silverstein, Seuss, Nash and Lear, Harris's hilarious debut molds wit and wordplay, nonsense and oxymoron, and visual and verbal sleight-of-hand in masterful ways that make you look at the world in a whole new wonderfully upside-down way. With enthusiastic endorsements from bestselling luminaries such as Lemony Snicket, Judith Viorst, Andrea Beaty, and many others, this entirely unique collection offers a surprise around every corner. Adding to the fun: Lane Smith, bestselling creator of beloved hits like It's a Book and The Stinky Cheese Man and Other Fairly Stupid Tales, has spectacularly illustrated this extraordinary collection with nearly one hundred pieces of appropriately absurd art. It's a mischievous match made in heaven! "Ridiculous, nonsensical, peculiar, outrageous, possibly deranged--and utterly, totally, absolutely delicious. Read it! Immediately!" --Judith Viorst, bestselling author of Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
Author: Robert N. Munsch Publisher: Firefly Books ISBN: 9780920668375 Category : Juvenile Nonfiction Languages : en Pages : 36
Book Description
A young woman holds her newborn son And looks at him lovingly. Softly she sings to him: "I'll love you forever I'll like you for always As long as I'm living My baby you'll be." So begins the story that has touched the hearts of millions worldwide. Since publication in l986, Love You Forever has sold more than 15 million copies in paperback and the regular hardcover edition (as well as hundreds of thousands of copies in Spanish and French). Firefly Books is proud to offer this sentimental favorite in a variety of editions and sizes: We offer a trade paper and laminated hardcover edition in a 8" x 8" size. In gift editions we carry: a slipcased edition (8 1/2" x 8 1/4"), with a laminated box and a cloth binding on the book and a 10" x 10" laminated hardcover with jacket. And a Big Book Edition, 16" x 16" with a trade paper binding.
Author: Ann Taylor Publisher: ISBN: Category : Children's poetry Languages : en Pages : 12
Book Description
"In verse, with pictures. By Ann Taylor. Title, imprint statement, and series transcribed from upper cover. Series transposed from head of title. "Moonbeam series."--series list, lower cover. The McLoughlin series, Fairy Moonbeam's series was renamed the Fairy Moonbeam series in the Catalogue of toy books, 1876. Clothing depicted in the illustrations is characteristic of that worn in the 1870s and 1880s (bustle dresses). "Just published. Uncle Dick's series. Large 16mo. Full-page pictures, elegantly printed in oil colors."--series list, lower cover. Cover included in pagination. Illustrations produced by a relief process (zinc etchings?)."
Author: Tomie dePaola Publisher: Penguin ISBN: 0399212582 Category : Juvenile Fiction Languages : en Pages : 130
Book Description
Since its original publication in 1985, Tomie dePaola’s Mother Goose has become a staple on children’s bookshelves everywhere, and features over two hundred Mother Goose rhymes charmingly illustrated by one of today’s most beloved artists. This special anniversary edition includes a framable print with brand-new art and an author’s note from Tomie, and is sure to continue as a family favorite for generations to come.
Proudly powered by WordPress |
Theme: Rits Blog by Crimson Themes.