The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce

The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce PDF Author: Julia M. Lewis
Publisher: Hachette UK
ISBN: 0786870737
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 352

Book Description
Divorce is at once a widespread reality and a painful decision, so it is no surprise that this landmark study of its long-term effects should both spark debate and find a large audience. In this compelling, thought-provoking book, Judith Wallerstein explains that, while children do learn to cope with divorce, it in fact takes its greatest toll in adulthood, when the sons and daughters of divorced parents embark on romantic relationships of their own. Wallerstein sensitively illustrates how children of divorce often feel that their relationships are doomed, seek to avoid conflict, and fear commitment. Failure in their loving relationships often seems to them preordained, even when things are going smoothly. As Wallerstein checks in on the adults she first encountered as youngsters more than twenty-five years ago, she finds that their experiences mesh with those of the millions of other children of divorce, who will find themselves on every page. With more than 100,000 copies in print, The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce spent three weeks on the New York Times, San Francisco Chronicle, and Denver Post bestseller lists. The book was also featured on two episodes of Oprah as well as on the front cover of Time and the New York Times Book Review.

The Love They Lost

The Love They Lost PDF Author: Stephanie Staal
Publisher: Random House of Canada
ISBN: 9780385334105
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 246

Book Description
Reveals how children who experienced their parents' divorce in the 1960s, 1970s, and 1980s developed fears of abandonment and betrayal, which continues to influence their ability to develop and commit to adult relationships.

What About the Kids?

What About the Kids? PDF Author: Sandra Blakeslee
Publisher: Hachette Books
ISBN: 1401397611
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 425

Book Description
The groundbreaking handbook that helps parents guide their children through divorce and co-parenting -- including the introduction of step-parents -- from a New York Times bestselling author and child psychologist. This is the definitive work from the renowned child psychologist Judith Wallerstein on a subject that concerns millions of American moms and dads: How can you protect your children during and after divorce? Divorce is not a single event but a lifelong trajectory of changed circumstances that demand a different kind of parenting than we have ever known. In What About the Kids? Wallerstein draws on thirty years of in-depth interviews with children of divorce and their parents to show how to create a new family with compassion and wisdom. It covers issues that arise at the time of divorce as well as suggestions for talking to your children months and years after the event. Eminent psychologist Judith S. Wallerstein shares her unique insight and advice in What About the Kids? -- the first comprehensive guide to easing the impact of divorce on your children -- including: The best and worst ages for children to experience their parents' divorce Right and wrong ways to explain divorce to your children Choosing a custody arrangement that's best for your child How to involve the grandparents -- a major resource? Getting the children on your side when you form new relationships The positive effects of divorce on children (believe it or not) How divorce can actually make you a better parent Raising children who grow up able to form lasting relationships

The Good Marriage: How and Why Love Lasts

The Good Marriage: How and Why Love Lasts PDF Author: Judith Wallerstein
Publisher: Plunkett Lake Press
ISBN:
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 277

Book Description
When it first appeared in 1995, The Good Marriage became a best-seller. It offers timeless clues to the secret of happy, long-lasting marriages. Based on a groundbreaking study of fifty couples who consider themselves happily married, psychologist Judith Wallerstein presents the four basic types of marriage — romantic, rescue, companionate, and traditional — and identifies nine developmental tasks that must be successfully undertaken in a “good marriage” — separation from the family of origin, up-and-down vicissitudes of early years, children, balance of work and home, dealing with infidelities, and more. The men and women Wallerstein interviewed readily admit that even the best relationship requires hard work and continuing negotiation, especially in the midst of societal pressures that can tear marriages apart. But they also convey an inspirational message, for almost all of them feel that their marriage is their single greatest accomplishment. The Good Marriage explains why, and its lively mix of storytelling and analysis will challenge every couple to think in a profoundly different way about the most important relationship in their lives. “Should be required reading for all who are interested in marriage.” — W. Walter Menninger “Should prove a lifesaver for many couples.” — Publishers Weekly “Will enrich the sparse literature on happy marriages.” — USA Today “One of the nice things about The Good Marriage is its modesty. It doesn’t pretend to offer a philosophy or even a lecture on marriage. It takes no position on the ideologically charged issues of women’s marital roles and status. Equally important, it ignores the two most common ways of talking about marriage — as a contract negotiated between two equal parties and as the pathway to individual fulfillment. For this reason it is refreshingly free of ‘rights’ talk and therapy talk. Indeed, Wallerstein places much more emphasis on the development of good judgment and a moral sense than on the acquisition of effective communication or negotiation skills.” — Barbara Dafoe Whitehead, The Atlantic “A lagniappe to enduring couplehood... The strength of this study is that Ms. Wallerstein, a gifted interviewer, persuades the couples to reveal their interior lives in rich, explicit detail.” — Susan Jacoby, The New York Times Book Review “Written in a masterful style that often reads like the best popular fiction... Wallerstein and Blakeslee again combine their substantial talents... deftly and entertainingly exploring the foundations of good marriages.” — Tara Aronson, San Francisco Examiner & Chronicle “Groundbreaking.” — Boston Globe “This is a wonderfully readable and immensely valuable book, full of wise and original insights about the many, many roads to marital happiness.” — Judith Viorst “With wisdom, humor, and sympathetic understanding, Judith Wallerstein helps us recognize and rediscover the good marriage... lucid, psychologically sophisticated, and generously wise.” — David Blankenhorn, Newsday “Historically informative as well as profoundly wise psychologically.” — Joan M. Erikson “For a long time, as a Rabbi, I’ve been using The Good Marriage, by the late Judith Wallerstein... in my pre-marital counseling. She provides... amazingly helpful insights [which] open up conversations and lead couples to think much more deeply about what they are getting themselves into — and what they might need to do to keep their marriages strong.” — Rabbi Carl M. Perkins “A welcome addition to the field of literature on contemporary marriage... The style [is] clear, concise, sensitive and, occasionally, personal. Her personal additions... add warmth, emotional consciousness, and greater insight into what makes individuals and couples happy in their relationships. This book has value for the many audiences interested in relational theory that want to approach relationships from a realistic and positive perspective.” — Nancy Williford, Clinical Social Work Journal “In The Good Marriage, Wallerstein’s new study of 50 married couples offers affirmation that the process of marriage itself presents a vehicle for transformation... A best-selling author, Wallerstein employs a thoughtful, nonaggressive style that appeals to the general public. Wallerstein has performed an invaluable service in The Good Marriage.” — Elizabeth M. Tully, M.D., Journal of Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry “Solid... impressive... Those interested in social policy should be pleased that so well-respected a liberal academic as Ms. Wallerstein has written a book that celebrates marriage and points the way toward restructuring it.” — Wall Street Journal “With extraordinary skill and compassion Wallerstein and Blakeslee take us inside the lives of fifty American couples and find that a good marriage still provides the best framework for enduring love and intimacy.” — Sylvia Ann Hewlett “A very appealing book... clearly written and clearly thought out.” — Library Journal “Wallerstein’s major contribution is not about how and why love lasts, but about how and why love develops. It is in such a context, less idyllic, but more realistic, that the book will prove to be a lasting contribution.” — Readings: A Journal of Reviews and Commentary in Mental Health

For Better Or for Worse

For Better Or for Worse PDF Author: Mavis E Hetherington
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 9780393324136
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 326

Book Description
Debunking popular wisdom on the devastating psychological and social effects of divorce, eminent psychologist Mavis Hetherington presents a more nuanced picture. This unprecedented look at our divorce-prone society concludes that the aftermath of divorce need not be a prescribed pathway of dissolution but can be one of healing and ultimate fulfillment. Copyright © Libri GmbH. All rights reserved.

Growing Up With Divorce

Growing Up With Divorce PDF Author: Neil Kalter
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 0743280857
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 436

Book Description
"Practical strategies to counteract the newly discovered long-term effects of divorce on children"--Jacket subtitle.

The Life-Saving Divorce

The Life-Saving Divorce PDF Author: Gretchen Baskerville
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781734374704
Category :
Languages : en
Pages :

Book Description
You Can Love God and Still Get a Divorce. And get this, God will still love you. Really. Are you in a destructive marriage? One of emotional, physical, or verbal abuse? Infidelity? Neglect? If yes, you know you need to escape, but you're probably worried about going against God's will. I have good news for you. You might need to divorce to save your life and sanity. And God is right beside you. In "The Life-Saving Divorce" You'll Learn: - How to know if you should stay or if you should go.- The four key Bible verses that support divorce for infidelity, neglect, and physical and/or emotional abuse. - Twenty-seven myths about divorce that aren't true for many Christians. - Why a divorce is likely the absolute best thing for your children. - How to deal with friends and family who disapprove of divorce. - How to find safe friends and churches after a divorce. Can you find happiness after leaving your destructive marriage? Absolutely yes! You can get your life back and flourish more than you thought possible. Are you ready? Then let's go. It's time to be free. This book includes multiple first-person interviews. Explains psychological abuse, gaslighting, the abuse cycle, Christian divorce and remarriage, children and divorce, domestic violence, parental alienation, mental abuse, and biblical reasons for divorce. Includes diagrams such as the Duluth Wheel of Power and Control (the Duluth Model) and the Abuse Cycle, as well as graphs based on Paul Amato's 2003 study analyzing Judith Wallerstein's book, The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce. Includes quotes by Leslie Vernick, Lundy Bancroft, Shannon Thomas, David Instone-Brewer, Natalie Hoffman, LifeWay Research, Kathleen Reay, Gottman Institute, Glenda Riley, Martin Luther, John Calvin, Steven Stosny, Michal Gilad, Leonie Westenberg, Nancy Nason-Clark, Julie Owens, Marg Mowczko, Justin Holcomb, Barna Group, Justin Lehmiller, Alan Hawkins, Brian Willoughby, William Doherty, Brad Wright, Bradford Wilcox, Sheila Gregoire, E Mavis Hetherington, John Kelly, Betsey Stevenson, Justin Wolfers, Norm Wright, Virginia Rutter, Judith Herman, and Bessel van der Kolk. Recommended reading list includes: Henry Cloud, John Townsend Boundaries books, Richard Warshack books.

Mother Daughter Me

Mother Daughter Me PDF Author: Katie Hafner
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 0812984595
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 289

Book Description
The complex, deeply binding relationship between mothers and daughters is brought vividly to life in Katie Hafner’s remarkable memoir, an exploration of the year she and her mother, Helen, spent working through, and triumphing over, a lifetime of unresolved emotions. Dreaming of a “year in Provence” with her mother, Katie urges Helen to move to San Francisco to live with her and Zoë, Katie’s teenage daughter. Katie and Zoë had become a mother-daughter team, strong enough, Katie thought, to absorb the arrival of a seventy-seven-year-old woman set in her ways. Filled with fairy-tale hope that she and her mother would become friends, and that Helen would grow close to her exceptional granddaughter, Katie embarked on an experiment in intergenerational living that she would soon discover was filled with land mines: memories of her parents’ painful divorce, of her mother’s drinking, of dislocating moves back and forth across the country, and of Katie’s own widowhood and bumpy recovery. Helen, for her part, was also holding difficult issues at bay. How these three women from such different generations learn to navigate their challenging, turbulent, and ultimately healing journey together makes for riveting reading. By turns heartbreaking and funny—and always insightful—Katie Hafner’s brave and loving book answers questions about the universal truths of family that are central to the lives of so many. Praise for Mother Daughter Me “The most raw, honest and engaging memoir I’ve read in a long time.”—KJ Dell’Antonia, The New York Times “A brilliant, funny, poignant, and wrenching story of three generations under one roof, unlike anything I have ever read.”—Abraham Verghese, author of Cutting for Stone “Weaving past with present, anecdote with analysis, [Katie] Hafner’s riveting account of multigenerational living and mother-daughter frictions, of love and forgiveness, is devoid of self-pity and unafraid of self-blame. . . . [Hafner is] a bright—and appealing—heroine.”—Cathi Hanauer, Elle “[A] frank and searching account . . . Currents of grief, guilt, longing and forgiveness flow through the compelling narrative.”—Steven Winn, San Francisco Chronicle “A touching saga that shines . . . We see how years-old unresolved emotions manifest.”—Lindsay Deutsch, USA Today “[Hafner’s] memoir shines a light on nurturing deficits repeated through generations and will lead many readers to relive their own struggles with forgiveness.”—Erica Jong, People “An unusually graceful story, one that balances honesty and tact . . . Hafner narrates the events so adeptly that they feel enlightening.”—Harper’s “Heartbreakingly honest, yet not without hope and flashes of wry humor.”—Kirkus Reviews “[An] emotionally raw memoir examining the delicate, inevitable shift from dependence to independence and back again.”—O: The Oprah Magazine (Ten Titles to Pick Up Now) “Scrap any romantic ideas about what goes on when a 40-something woman invites her mother to live with her and her teenage daughter for a year. As Hafner hilariously and touchingly tells it, being the center of a family sandwich is, well, complicated.”—Parade

Child of Divorce, Child of God

Child of Divorce, Child of God PDF Author: Kristine Steakley
Publisher: InterVarsity Press
ISBN: 0830874712
Category : Religion
Languages : en
Pages : 182

Book Description
Children of divorce carry wounds into adulthood. Divorce affects our relationships to other people, our fears and longings, our faith, and our spirituality. We may have difficulties with anger, guilt, commitment or forgiveness. But our identity need not be marked only by our parents' divorce. God can enter into our woundedness and bring transformation and hope. Kristine Steakley chronicles the emotional and spiritual challenges facing adult children of divorce. She tells her own story of abandonment and estrangement with all the attendant questions of trust, self-worth and identity. But she has found that God can repair and reparent us in ways that heal and restore our relationships with ourselves, our parents and God.

Primal Loss

Primal Loss PDF Author: Leila Miller
Publisher: Lcb Publishing
ISBN: 9780997989311
Category : Adult children of divorced parents
Languages : en
Pages : 326

Book Description
Seventy now-adult children of divorce give their candid and often heart-wrenching answers to eight questions (arranged in eight chapters, by question), including: What were the main effects of your parents' divorce on your life? What do you say to those who claim that "children are resilient" and "children are happy when their parents are happy"? What would you like to tell your parents then and now? What do you want adults in our culture to know about divorce? What role has your faith played in your healing? Their simple and poignant responses are difficult to read and yet not without hope. Most of the contributors--women and men, young and old, single and married--have never spoken of the pain and consequences of their parents' divorce until now. They have often never been asked, and they believe that no one really wants to know. Despite vastly different circumstances and details, the similarities in their testimonies are striking; as the reader will discover, the death of a child's family impacts the human heart in universal ways.
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