Reasons Mommy Drinks

Author: Lyranda Martin-Evans
Publisher: Crown
ISBN: 0385349300
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 226

Book Description
A wickedly funny look at the challenges of new parenthood. With cocktail recipes. Being a new mom is “AHHHH! WHAT HAVE I DONE?” hard. Why are all these tiny clothes so expensive? Who wrote these mind-numbing board books? Will Mommy ever carry a purse again that’s not a diaper bag? And how is she even functioning off so little sleep? Reasons Mommy Drinks is a fresh, insightful, and hilarious collection of the various struggles faced by new parents—from mommy groups and single-people envy to the end of maternity leave—with a well-deserved cocktail recipe to go with each one. This must-have resource will help sleep-deprived new moms survive the baby years with their sense of humor, if not their lives as they once knew them, intact.

You're the Reason Mommy Drinks

Author: Brandon Rhiness
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781788300179
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 36

Book Description
Everyone thinks it, but nobody says it. Finally, there's an author with the courage to write what everyone's been thinking. You're the Reason Mommy Drinks is a children's book that is definitely not for children. But it will leave every mother worldwide nodding her head in agreement.

Mommy Mixology

Author: Janet Frongillo
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1612430864
Category : Cooking
Languages : en
Pages : 110

Book Description
A Simon & Schuster eBook. Simon & Schuster has a great book for every reader.

Mommy Drinks Because You Cry

Author: Hannah Caner
Publisher: Castle Point Books
ISBN: 9781250119919
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 0

Book Description
Pull Mommy back from the edge with this irreverent adult coloring book! MOMMY DRINKS BECAUSE YOU CRY is the adult coloring book for the delightfully impolite. For the rare moments you have to yourself, enjoy the calming act of coloring with a little dose of sass. This collection of beautiful designs and fun illustrations are paired with the very best of all our worst thoughts, from “I child-proofed my house, but they still get in,” to “Home is where the vodka is.” Each hilariously captioned design is printed on sturdy, tear-out pages perfect for amusing decoration or passive-aggressive gift-giving. When you want to unwind with coloring but aren’t in the mood to embrace sunshine and daisies, MOMMY DRINKS BECAUSE YOU CRY is the perfect adult coloring book to let you speak your native sarcasm!

Why Mommy Swears

Author: Gill Sims
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 0008298793
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 273

Book Description
Why Mommy Swears is the much anticipated new novel from Gill Sims, author of the hilarious Why Mommy Drinks and online sensation Peter and Jane.

Moms Who Drink and Swear

Author: Nicole Knepper
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 110165094X
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 337

Book Description
If you feel like your kids are killing you, you’ve come to the right place. This irreverant, hilarious guide to the trials of motherhood makes the perfect gift for mom—or any woman with a huge heart and a mouth that sometimes needs washing out with soap. Attention all potty-mouthed, cheap-wine-drinking mothers: Prepare to meet your match. Any bad thought you’ve had about your kids, Nicole Knepper has had worse. Much worse. It’s not that she doesn’t love her kids. It’s that she understands what a mind-f*?% it can be to try to civilize those wild little beasts. Based on her hugely popular Facebook page, “Moms Who Drink and Swear,” this book reveals why family dinners are like herpes, how to avoid smashing toys that are being fought over, and the joy of hearing that your son has murdered his imaginary friend. As Nicole rants and raves about caring for children (without crushing their souls), family togetherness (without too many tears), the saving grace of girlfriends (and vodka), and love and marriage (and all the baggage that goes with them), she gets to the heart of what every exasperated mom is thinking, just much funnier.

The Cursing Mommy's Book of Days

Author: Ian Frazier
Publisher: Farrar, Straus and Giroux
ISBN: 0374709491
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 254

Book Description
Based on his widely read columns for The New Yorker, Ian Frazier's uproarious first novel, The Cursing Mommy's Book of Days, centers on a profoundly memorable character, sprung from an impressively fertile imagination. Structured as a daybook of sorts, the book follows the Cursing Mommy—beleaguered wife of Larry and mother of two boys, twelve and eight—as she tries (more or less) valiantly to offer tips on how to do various tasks around the home, only to end up on the ground, cursing, surrounded by broken glass. Her voice is somewhere between Phyllis Diller's and Sylvia Plath's: a hilariously desperate housewife with a taste for swearing and large glasses of red wine, who speaks to the frustrations of everyday life. Frazier has demonstrated an astonishing ability to operate with ease in a variety of registers: from On the Rez, an investigation into the lives of modern day Oglala Sioux written with a mix of humor, compassion, and imagination, to Dating Your Mom, a sidesplitting collection of humorous essays that imagines, among other things, how and why you might begin a romance with your mother. Here, Frazier tackles another genre with his usual grace and aplomb, as well as an extra helping of his trademark wicked wit. The Cursing Mommy's failures and weaknesses are our own—and Frazier gives them a loving, satirical spin that is uniquely his own.

Why Daddy Hits Mommy

Author: Brad Gosse
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781658902557
Category :
Languages : en
Pages : 24

Book Description
Why Daddy Hits Mommy. When dad comes home he wants 2 thinks. A whiskey drink and spotless sinks. Even though your mommy works too. Dad's domestic labor expectations are askew. Once daddy enjoys drinky three. It's time for you and mom to flee. To grandmas house, you'd better go. Or mom will suffer several blows. To the face is where daddy hits. Because he drinks and cannot quits. Please remember dad is sick. Even when he uses a stick. Alcohol is daddy's crutch. And that's why he hits mom too much.

Baby, Mix Me a Drink

Author: Lisa Brown
Publisher: McSweeney's, Irregulars
ISBN: 9781932416459
Category : Bartending
Languages : en
Pages : 0

Book Description
Humorous instruction manual teaches baby how to mix a martini, a margarita, a bloody Mary, an old-fashinoed, and a champagne cocktail.

I Drink Mommy's Milk

Author: Susan Cazenavette Herrick Siu
Publisher:
ISBN: 9780982823224
Category : Breastfeeding
Languages : en
Pages : 20

Book Description
A mammal is an animal that drinks its mother's milk. Open this book to learn more about baby mammals and their favorite food. And remember : you are a mammal, too!