Everyone You Hate Is Going to Die

Author: Daniel Sloss
Publisher: Knopf
ISBN: 0525658149
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 273

Book Description
One of this generation's hottest and boldest young comedians presents a transgressive and hilarious analysis of all of our dysfunctional relationships, and attempts to point us in the vague direction of sanity. Daniel Sloss's stand-up comedy engages, enrages, offends, unsettles, educates, comforts, and gets audiences roaring with laughter—all at the same time. In his groundbreaking specials, seen on Netflix and HBO, he has brilliantly tackled everything from male toxicity and friendship to love, romance, and marriage—and claims (with the data to back it up) that his on-stage laser-like dissection of relationships has single-handedly caused more than 300 divorces and 120,000 breakups. Now, in his first book, he picks up where his specials left off, and goes after every conceivable kind of relationship—with one's country (Sloss's is Scotland); with America; with lovers, ex-lovers, ex-lovers who you hate, ex-lovers who hate you; with parents; with best friends (male and female), not-best friends; with children; with siblings; and even with the global pandemic and our own mortality. In Everyone You Hate Is Going to Die, every human connection gets the brutally funny (and unfailingly incisive) Sloss treatment as he illuminates the ways in which all of our relationships are fragile and ridiculous and awful—but also valuable and meaningful and important.

The Jackals

Author: William W. Johnstone
Publisher: Pinnacle Books
ISBN: 078604389X
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 386

Book Description
Three vigilantes are trapped like rats in this action-packed Western series opener by the authors of the New York Times–bestselling Smoke Jensen series. Fate brought them together. It may also send them straight to hell. With Apaches on the prod, ex-cavalry sergeant Sean Keegan, bounty hunter Jed Breen, and ex-Texas Ranger Matt McCulloch take shelter in a West Texas way station—along with a hot-as-a-pistol female bound for the gallows, a spiteful newspaper editor, and a coward with $50,000 who promises them five grand if they’ll deliver his blood-soaked stash to his wife. Turns out, Indians might be the least of the problems for the trio, soon to be known as the Jackals. The loot’s stolen property of the vengeful Hawkin gang, and these prairie rats are merciless, stone-cold killers. And the brother of the man the woman killed wants to butcher her himself rather than watch her swing. McCulloch, Keegan, and Breen are ready for a showdown—but the Jackals may not live to spend that $5,000. Perfect for fans of The Hateful Eight.

How to Die Alone

Author: Mo Welch
Publisher: Workman Publishing
ISBN: 1523504269
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 145

Book Description
There’s an entire industry built on the idea of helping people to push hard and succeed in love, work, fitness, and finances. But what about those people who would so much rather stay home and eat pizza with the cat while binge-watching Netflix? Who’s telling them that it’s OK to be a couch potato? Blair, that’s who. The creation of cartoonist and stand-up comic Mo Welch, Blair is the awkward, self-deprecating, totally relatable anti-heroine who already has 65,000 followers on Instagram and an animated show on TBS Digital. Now Blair is the face, the voice, and the attitude of How to Die Alone, the perfect self-help book for not helping yourself—and a funny, irreverent gift for millennials struggling to “adult.” Forget winning friends and influencing people—here’s advice on how to win the Worst Friend Award instead, including: Always be late, never offer to drive (anywhere), and treat your friend’s kitchen like an open bar. Plus the ins and outs of terrible dates, permission to eat cookies instead of going to the gym, and how to treat your job like the inconvenience that it is. It’s the genuinely funny, tongue-in-cheek guide to just saying no.

How I Escaped My Certain Fate

Author: Stewart Lee
Publisher: Faber & Faber
ISBN: 0571254829
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 402

Book Description
Experience how it feels to be the subject of a blasphemy prosecution! Find out why 'wool' is a funny word! See how jokes work, their inner mechanisms revealed, before your astonished face! In 2001, after over a decade in the business, Stewart Lee quit stand-up, disillusioned and drained, and went off to direct a loss-making musical, Jerry Springer: The Opera. Nine years later, How I Escaped My Certain Fate details his return to live performance, and the journey that took him from an early retirement to his position as the most critically acclaimed stand-up in Britain, the winner of BAFTAs and British Comedy Awards, and the affirmation of being rated the 41st best stand up ever. Here is Stewart Lee's own account of his remarkable comeback, told through transcripts of the three legendary full-length shows that sealed his reputation. Astonishingly frank and detailed in-depth notes reveal the inspiration and inner workings of his act. With unprecedented access to a leading comedian's creative process, this book tells us just what it was like to write these shows, develop the performance and take them on tour. How I Escaped My Certain Fate is everything we have come to expect from Stewart Lee: fiercely intelligent, unsparingly honest and very, very funny.

Failure Is an Option

Author: H. Jon Benjamin
Publisher: Penguin
ISBN: 152474218X
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 258

Book Description
“Writing this funny requires immense talent.” —AV Club H. Jon Benjamin—the lead voice behind Archer and Bob's Burgers—helps us all feel a little better about our own failures by sharing his own in a hilarious memoir-ish chronicle of failure. Most people would consider H. Jon Benjamin a comedy show business success. But he'd like to remind everyone that as great as success can be, failure is also an option. And maybe the best option. In this book, he tells stories from his own life, from his early days ("wherein I'm unable to deliver a sizzling fajita") to his romantic life ("how I failed to quantify a threesome") to family ("wherein a trip to P.F. Chang's fractures a family") to career ("how I failed at launching a kid's show"). As Jon himself says, breaking down one's natural ability to succeed is not an easy task, but also not an insurmountable one. Society as we know it is, sadly, failure averse. But more acceptance of failure, as Jon sees it, will go a long way to making this world a different place . . . a kinder, gentler place, where gardens are overgrown and most people stay home with their pets. A vision of failure, but also a vision of freedom. With stories, examples of artistic and literary failure, and a powerful can't-do attitude, Failure Is an Option is the book the world doesn't need right now but will get regardless.

Tomorrow We Die (First Responders Book #2)

Author: Shawn Grady
Publisher: Bethany House
ISBN: 1441212124
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 333

Book Description
Jonathan Trestle is a paramedic who's spent the week a few steps behind the angel of death. When he responds to a call about a man sprawled on a downtown sidewalk, Trestle isn't about to lose another victim. CPR revives the man long enough for him to hand Trestle a crumpled piece of paper and say, "Give this to Martin," before being taken to the hospital. The note is a series of dashes and haphazard scribbles. Trestle tries to follow up with the patient later, but at the ICU he learns the man awoke, pulled out his IVs, and vanished, leaving only a single key behind. Jonathan tracks the key to a nearby motel where he finds the man again--this time not just dead but murdered. Unwilling to just let it drop, Jonathan is plunged into a mystery that soon threatens not only his dreams for the future but maybe even his life.

Differentiate Or Die

Author: Jack Trout
Publisher: John Wiley & Sons
ISBN:
Category : Business & Economics
Languages : en
Pages : 248

Book Description
Now that product differences are rapidly and easily copied, or are perceived to be minimal, differentiating a company's products and services from the competition has become key to corporate survival. Marketing guru Jack Trout delivers a practical guide for businesses on developing powerful differentiation strategies.

Nothing Lasts Forever (Basis for the film Die Hard)

Author: Roderick Thorp
Publisher: Graymalkin Media
ISBN: 193516984X
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 172

Book Description
High atop a Los Angeles skyscraper, an office Christmas party turns into a deadly cage-match between a lone New York City cop and a gang of international terrorists. Every action fan knows it could only be the explosive big-screen blockbuster Die Hard. But before Bruce Willis blew away audiences as unstoppable hero John McClane, author Roderick Thorp knocked out thriller readers with the bestseller that started it all. A dozen heavily armed terrorists have taken hostages, issued demands, and promised bloodshed — all according to plan. But they haven’t counted on a death-defying, one-man cavalry with no shoes, no backup, and no intention of going down easily. As hot-headed cops swarm outside, and cold-blooded killers wield machine guns and rocket launchers inside, the stage is set for the ultimate showdown between anti-hero and uber-villains. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good fight... to the death. Ho ho ho!

Born Standing Up

Author: Steve Martin
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1847395848
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 198

Book Description
Steve Martin has been an international star for over thirty years. Here, for the first time, he looks back to the beginning of his career and charmingly evokes the young man he once was. Born in Texas but raised in California, Steve was seduced early by the comedy shows that played on the radio when the family travelled back and forth to visit relatives. When Disneyland opened just a couple of miles away from home, an enchanted Steve was given his first chance to learn magic and entertain an audience. He describes how he noted the reaction to each joke in a ledger - 'big laugh' or 'quiet' - and assiduously studied the acts of colleagues, stealing jokes when needed. With superb detail, Steve recreates the world of small, dark clubs and the fear and exhilaration of standing in the spotlight. While a philosophy student at UCLA, he worked hard at local clubs honing his comedy and slowly attracting a following until he was picked up to write for TV. From here on, Steve Martin became an acclaimed comedian, packing out venues nationwide. One night, however, he noticed empty seats and realised he had 'reached the top of the rollercoaster'. BORN STANDING UP is a funny and riveting chronicle of how Steve Martin became the comedy genius we now know and is also a fascinating portrait of an era.

Donald Robertson Is Not a Stand Up Comedian

Author: Gary McNair
Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing
ISBN: 178319667X
Category : Performing Arts
Languages : en
Pages : 52

Book Description
What would you do if everyone in the world hated you? Would you run? Would you fight? Or would you try to make them laugh? Donald Robertson has no mates and he isn't funny. But with guidance from his new mentor Gary, he hopes that this is all about to change. Donald Robertson Is Not A Stand Up Comedian is a darkly comic coming of age story that explores the need to belong and deconstructs the brutal role that humour can play in society.