Our Socially Awkward Marriage: Stories from an Asperger's Relationship

Our Socially Awkward Marriage: Stories from an Asperger's Relationship PDF Author: Tom Peters
Publisher: Brookside Press
ISBN: 9780984223039
Category : Humor
Languages : en
Pages : 108

Book Description
Through a series of warm and uplifting stories, Tom and Linda Peters take you into the heart of their socially awkward marriage. Tom had long suspected that there was something wrong with him, but despite his best efforts, he could never figure out what it was. With the help of Linda, a writer and investigator who he would later marry, Tom went looking for answers that would explain his quirky way of seeing the world. At the age of 47, he was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome, a high-functioning form of autism. Raw and personal, this book of essays was first inspired by Tom's challenges with Asperger's Syndrome, but the humorous bite-sized stories apply to any kind of interpersonal communication. The simple solutions that Tom and Linda have discovered - while dressing up a phrenology head or removing a wild opossum from the master bath - have the surprising power to help us learn how to feel more respected, heard and understood in all of our relationships. Introduction Remember that weird kid in the back of the classroom who just couldn't stop talking about astronomy, and would bring up the discovery of Pluto during lessons about the American Civil War? That was me. My name is Tom Peters. I'm a composer and GRAMMY(R)-nominated classical musician now, and I've played music all over the world. I have a wife named Linda, a college-aged son from my first marriage, and eight different types of stringed instruments at home including six ukuleles. In 2011, at the tender age of 47, I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. At that time, Asperger's Syndrome was considered a mild form of autism, characterized by an inability to understand how to interact socially. Those of us with Asperger's - or Aspies, as a term of endearment - tend to have few facial expressions and are apt to stare blankly at other people. It's nothing personal; we really can't help it. Aspies are often accused of being "in their own world" and preoccupied with their own thoughts. We are usually clumsy with uncoordinated movements, are socially awkward, have repetitive routines or rituals, and odd speech and language. Which didn't exactly make me a chick magnet. Regardless of an Aspie's age or place in life, relationships are often a challenge. Being unable to understand nonverbal communication or how you relate to the people around you can cause Aspies to blurt out inappropriate remarks and say just plain odd things, usually at exactly the wrong time. But it's not all bad news. The unusual focus and intensity that goes along with this disorder has helped me to hone my skills as a professional double bass player and later, as a composer of silent film scores. On a personal level, I am honest, dependable and straightforward. I love deeply and always try to do my best. I don't play mind games. I don't know how. And now, as a middle-aged adult, I'm in a happy, healthy relationship. My wife, Linda, is a writer who used to work with adults with mental, emotional and developmental disabilities. It was Linda's idea for me to share some anecdotes about what it felt like to be on the high-functioning end of the autism spectrum. She thought it might help someone to hear me articulate the feelings involved in some of the unique challenges I face. Around the same time, we also started writing articles together about how we were making communication work so well in our Asperger's relationship. This book is a collection of some of those articles and blog posts about our lives. Most of the stories are about being on the spectrum, or about living with someone who is on the spectrum. Almost all the stories take place in the context of our Asperger's relationship and subsequent marriage. We hope that you enjoy reading them!

Neurodiverse Relationships

Neurodiverse Relationships PDF Author: Joanna Stevenson
Publisher: Jessica Kingsley Publishers
ISBN: 1787750299
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 218

Book Description
Comprised of the accounts of twelve heterosexual couples in which the man is on the Autism Spectrum, this book invites both partners to discuss their own perspectives of different key issues, including anxiety, empathy, employment and socialising. Autism expert Tony Attwood contributes a commentary and a question and answer section for each of the twelve accounts. The first book of its kind to provide perspectives from both sides of a relationship on a variety of different topics, Neurodiverse Relationships is the perfect companion for couples in neurodiverse relationships who are trying to understand one another better.

Awkward

Awkward PDF Author: Ty Tashiro
Publisher: HarperCollins
ISBN: 0062429175
Category : Psychology
Languages : en
Pages : 147

Book Description
Discover how the same traits that make us feel uneasy in social situations also provide the seeds for extraordinary success. As humans, we all need to belong. While modern social life can make even the most charismatic of us feel gawky, for roughly one in five of us, navigating its challenges is overwhelming. Psychologist and interpersonal relationship expert Ty Tashiro knows what it’s like to be awkward. Growing up, he could do complex arithmetic in his head and memorize the earned run averages of every National League starting pitcher. But he struggled to add up social cues during interactions with other kids and was prone to forget routine social expectations. In Awkard, Ty unpacks decades of research in the fields of psychology, neuroscience, and sociology to help us better understand this widely share trait and its origins. He considers how awkward people view our complex world and explains how we can more comfortably engage with it, delivering a welcome, counterintuitive message: the same characteristics that make people socially clumsy can be harnessed to produce remarkable achievements. Interweaving the latest research with personal tales and real-world examples, Awkward provides valuable insights into how we can embrace our personal quirks and unique talents to realize our awesome potential.

Alone Together

Alone Together PDF Author: Katrin Bentley
Publisher: Jessica Kingsley Publishers
ISBN: 1843105373
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 132

Book Description
Thousands of people live in Asperger marriages without recognizing the signs that their spouse has AS. When Swiss-born Katrin met Gavin while backpacking in Australia, she fell in love with a man that was kind, good looking and different. He followed her to Switzerland where they married eight months later. At first everything seemed fine, but once back in Australia things changed very drastically. Alone Together shares the struggle of one couple to rescue their marriage. It explains the clues that suggest a person might have AS and explores the effect of diagnosis. It is uplifting and humorous and includes plenty of tips for making as Asperger marriage succeed. This book offers couples hope, encouragement and strategies for their own relationships.

The Journal of Best Practices

The Journal of Best Practices PDF Author: David Finch
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1439189757
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 235

Book Description
*A New York Times Bestseller* A warm and hilarious memoir by a man diagnosed with Asperger syndrome who sets out to save his relationship. Five years after David Finch married Kristen, the love of his life, they learned that he has Asperger syndrome. The diagnosis explained David’s ever-growing list of quirks and compulsions, but it didn’t make him any easier to live with. Determined to change, David set out to understand Asperger syndrome and learn to be a better husband with an endearing zeal. His methods for improving his marriage involve excessive note-taking, performance reviews, and most of all, the Journal of Best Practices: a collection of hundreds of maxims and hard-won epiphanies, including “Don’t change the radio station when she’s singing along” and “Apologies do not count when you shout them.” David transforms himself from the world’s most trying husband to the husband who tries the hardest. He becomes the husband he’d always meant to be. Filled with humor and wisdom, The Journal of Best Practices is a candid story of ruthless self-improvement, a unique window into living with an autism spectrum condition, and proof that a true heart is the key to happy marriage.

What Shamu Taught Me About Life, Love, and Marriage

What Shamu Taught Me About Life, Love, and Marriage PDF Author: Amy Sutherland
Publisher: Random House
ISBN: 1588366901
Category : Self-Help
Languages : en
Pages : 194

Book Description
While observing exotic animal trainers for her acclaimed book Kicked, Bitten, and Scratched, journalist Amy Sutherland had an epiphany: What if she used these training techniques with the human animals in her own life–namely her dear husband, Scott? In this lively and perceptive book, Sutherland tells how she took the trainers’ lessons home. The next time her forgetful husband stomped through the house in search of his mislaid car keys, she asked herself, “What would a dolphin trainer do?” The answer was: nothing. Trainers reward the behavior they want and, just as important, ignore the behavior they don’t. Rather than appease her mate’s rising temper by joining in the search, or fuel his temper by nagging him to keep better track of his things in the first place, Sutherland kept her mouth shut and her eyes on the dishes she was washing. In short order, Scott found his keys and regained his cool. “I felt like I should throw him a mackerel,” she writes. In time, as she put more training principles into action, she noticed that she became more optimistic and less judgmental, and their twelve-year marriage was better than ever. What started as a goofy experiment had such good results that Sutherland began using the training techniques with all the people in her life, including her mother, her friends, her students, even the clerk at the post office. In the end, the biggest lesson she learned is that the only animal you can truly change is yourself. Full of fun facts, fascinating insights, hilarious anecdotes, and practical tips, What Shamu Taught Me About Life, Love, and Marriage describes Sutherland’s Alice-in-Wonderland experience of stumbling into a world where cheetahs walk nicely on leashes and elephants paint with watercolors, and of leaving a new, improved Homo sapiens.

Awakening Prince Charming

Awakening Prince Charming PDF Author: Roscelia Dávila
Publisher: WestBow Press
ISBN: 1664200622
Category : Religion
Languages : en
Pages : 195

Book Description
My brothers used to call me “Cinderelli” because I was constantly baking or cleaning when we were growing up. They used to ask, “Where is your Prince Charming?” The long-awaited wedding day came, and after only two years of marriage, I was ready to leave my husband with a newborn in my arms. I could not bear the mental anguish that I was experiencing due to my husband’s belligerent behavior. I was contemplating divorce when a spiritual inspiration revealed to me that my spouse had autism. This personal revelation led my husband and I on a journey of healing, forgiving, and change of heart thanks to the influence of the atonement, the teachings of Jesus Christ, and my background in special education. Awakening Prince Charming: Autism and the Sacrament of Marriage documents my introspective process of faith and critical thinking that enabled my husband and I to keep the vows we made to each other when we said, “I do.” Since my change of heart and approach, I have witnessed the miracle of the power of the Holy Ghost and the love of God awakened my Prince Charming.

The Dearly Beloved

The Dearly Beloved PDF Author: Cara Wall
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1982104546
Category : Fiction
Languages : en
Pages : 384

Book Description
“This gentle, gorgeously written book may be one of my favorites ever.” —Jenna Bush Hager (A Today show “Read with Jenna” Book Club Selection!) This “moving portrait of love and friendship set against a backdrop of social change” (The New York Times Book Review, Editor’s Choice) traces two married couples whose lives become entangled when the husbands become copastors at a famed New York city congregation in the 1960s. Charles and Lily, James and Nan. They meet in Greenwich Village in 1963 when Charles and James are jointly hired to steward the historic Third Presbyterian Church through turbulent times. Their personal differences however, threaten to tear them apart. Charles is destined to succeed his father as an esteemed professor of history at Harvard, until an unorthodox lecture about faith leads him to ministry. How then, can he fall in love with Lily—fiercely intellectual, elegantly stern—after she tells him with certainty that she will never believe in God? And yet, how can he not? James, the youngest son in a hardscrabble Chicago family, spent much of his youth angry at his alcoholic father and avoiding his anxious mother. Nan grew up in Mississippi, the devout and beloved daughter of a minister and a debutante. James’s escape from his desperate circumstances leads him to Nan and, despite his skepticism of hope in all its forms, her gentle, constant faith changes the course of his life. In The Dearly Beloved, Cara wall reminds us of “the power of the novel in its simplest, richest form: bearing intimate witness to human beings grappling with their faith and falling in love,” (Entertainment Weekly, A-) as we follow these two couples through decades of love and friendship, jealousy and understanding, forgiveness and commitment. Against the backdrop of turbulent changes facing the city and the church’s congregation, Wall offers a poignant meditation on faith and reason, marriage and children, and the ways we find meaning in our lives. The Dearly Beloved is a gorgeous, wise, and provocative novel that is destined to become a classic.

Nerdy, Shy, and Socially Inappropriate

Nerdy, Shy, and Socially Inappropriate PDF Author: Cynthia Kim
Publisher: Jessica Kingsley Publishers
ISBN: 0857009494
Category : Family & Relationships
Languages : en
Pages : 242

Book Description
Cynthia Kim explores all the quirkyness of living with Asperger Syndrome (ASD) in this accessible, witty and honest guide looking from an insider perspective at some of the most challenging and intractable aspects of being autistic. Her own life presents many rich examples. From being labelled nerdy and shy as an undiagnosed child to redefining herself when diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome as an adult, she describes how her perspective shifted to understanding a previously confusing world and combines this with the results of extensive research to explore the 'why' of ASD traits. She explains how they impact on everything from self-care to holding down a job and offers typically practical and creative strategies to help manage them, including a section on the vestibular, sensory and social benefits of martial arts for people with autism. Well known in the autism community and beyond for her popular blog, Musings of an Aspie, Cynthia Kim's book is rich with personal anecdotes and useful advice. This intelligent insider guide will help adults with ASDs and their partners, family members, friends, and colleagues, but it also provides a fresh and witty window onto a different worldview.

Leading the Way

Leading the Way PDF Author: Mary K. Trigg
Publisher: Rutgers University Press
ISBN: 0813546850
Category : Biography & Autobiography
Languages : en
Pages : 235

Book Description
Leading the Way is a collection of personal essays written by twenty-one young, hopeful American women who describe their work, activism, leadership, and efforts to change the world. It responds to critical portrayals of this generation of "twenty-somethings" as being disengaged and apathetic about politics, social problems, and civic causes. Bringing together graduates of a women's leadership certificate program at Rutgers University's Institute for Women's Leadership, these essays provide a contrasting picture to assumptions about the current death of feminism, the rise of selfishness and individualism, and the disaffected Millennium Generation. Reflecting on a critical juncture in their livesùthe years during college and the beginning of careers or graduate studiesùthe contributors' voices demonstrate the ways that diverse, young, educated women in the United States are embodying and formulating new models of leadership, at the same time as they are finding their own professional paths, ways of being, and places in the world. They reflect on controversial issues such as gay marriage, gender, racial profiling, war, immigration, poverty, urban education, and health care reform in a post-9/11 era. Leading the Way introduces readers to young women who are being prepared and empowered to assume leadership roles with men in all public arenas, and to accept equal responsibility for making positive social change in the twenty-first century.
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